CAST:
VERONICA
MARTA
MUM
CHANNEL 7
CHANNEL 9
ABC
BOGAN
(VERONICA wakes up. She’s tired, sick and groggy but gets up to hurriedly eat her breakfast as she rushes to the living room to turn on the telly.)
CHANNEL 7: So I’m here in front of Parliament house and…well. Nothing’s really happening here so we’ll cut back to–
(MUM enters)
MUM: Good morning sweetheart.
VERONICA: Hi.
MUM: Anything good on?
VERONICA: Not really. I’m waiting for the ballot.
MUM: Is it on now?
VERONICA: 9am.
MUM: So not now.
VERONICA: In an hour.
MUM: Oh good. (pause) Can I watch my Polish TV.
VERONICA: Ok, but we have to switch back at 9am.
(MUM switches to Polish Satellite Television where her and VERONICA watch a cooking show, and then a family weightloss show, from New Zealand but dubbed in Polish)
VERONICA: (as soon as the credits roll) Ok change it back change it back.
(MUM switches back to Australian channels).
CHANNEL 7: Ummmmmmmm
VERONICA: Hand me the remote
(Changes channel)
CHANNEL 9: Errrrrrrrrrrrrrr
VERONICA: FUCK!
(Changes channel)
ABC: So….
VERONICA: Oh my god! What’s happening!?
(Changes channel)
CHANNEL 9: So they are currently in the room, and we’re waiting for a notice. A result. Anything to tell us what is going on and who is our next Prime Minister. What’s happening on Twitter?
VERONICA: You’ve got to be kidding me.
MUM: What’s Twitter?
(Changes Channel)
CHANNEL 7: So, um, what’s happening?
VERONICA: Urgh!
(Changes Channel)
MUM: Are you on Twitter?
ABC: So what do you think is going to happen.
VERONICA: This is insane.
MUM: Alright well I’m off to my varicose vein ultra sound.
VERONICA: See ya.
(Changes Channel)
CHANNEL 7: Hello?
VERONICA: Fuck.
(Changes Channel)
CHANNEL 9: Someone’s coming out! Shh. Shhh. Get off the phone.
(VERONICA watches and listens to the announcement. She’s stunned and doesn’t quite know what to do.)
CHANNEL 9: So that’s it!
(Changes Channel)
CHANNEL 7: Ranga.
(Change)
CHANNEL 9: Woman.
(Change)
CHANNEL 7: Ranga?
(Change)
CHANNEL 9: Woman?
(Change)
CHANNEL 7: No!
(Change)
CHANNEL 9: Yes!
(Change)
ABC: Maybe.
(Change)
CHANNEL 9: Shhh! Shhhh! He’s coming out! He’s going to say something.
(VERONICA watches and listens to the speech. She’s moved. She places her hand to her heart, and shakes her head lightly. MUM comes back from the ultrasound.)
MUM: And?
VERONICA: He’s going.
MUM: Really!
VERONICA: Yeah. He’s crying.
MUM: Oh, poor guy. (pause) Oh well. He fucked it for himself.
(They continue watching till the end of the speech.)
MUM: Well, that was nice.
(Changes Channel)
CHANNEL 7: Errrrrrrrrr.
(Changes Channel)
CHANNEL 9: That was so nice, with the family and the crying and all that. He wasn’t so bad after all. Yeah, and look at all the good things he’s done. Awww. What does Twitter say?
VERONICA: It was a pretty good speech.
MUM: Yes. It was. This is all really exciting.
VERONICA: Yeah.
CHANNEL 9: Shhhh Shhhh! She’s coming out to speak!
(VERONICA and MUM watch the second speech)
MUM: Ooo I like her.
VERONICA: Shh.
MUM: Is she a lawyer.
VERONICA: Industrial.
MUM: How old is she?
VERONICA: Does it matter?
MUM: I just wanted to know.
VERONICA: I don’t know.
MUM: She’s not married is she?
VERONICA: No. And she’s not religious either.
MUM: Oh that’s nice. Be a nice change. A fresh start.
VERONICA: Yeah, could be.
(The speech finishes.)
CHANNEL 9: She’s not too bad hey?
(Changes Channel)
CHANNEL 7: Ranga Woman Ranga Woman
(VERONICA turns the television off.)
VERONICA: I need to get out of here.
(MARTA enters)
MARTA: I’m going to the shops, you want anything?
VERONICA: I need to come with you, I have to pick up something from the chemist.
(MARTA and VERONICA walk down the street to the shops. BOGAN approaches.)
BOGAN: You women must be pretty happy now that Julia Gillard is now Prime Minister!
VERONICA: Oh for fucks sake.
THE END.
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